Shock as West Ham win game

"What happens now?" ask Dildo Brothers.

“I said give me Sakho, not the sack,” roars incredulous de Boer

Crystal Palace sack manager after humorous misunderstanding.

PSG to FIFA: We earn the income from a thriving Avon business

Ligue 1 giants claim not to be in breach of FPP thanks to cosmetics sales.

Sadio Mané visits Ederson’s head in hospital

Shows sportsmanship after kicking it off.

Ton up! Harry Kane celebrates 100th “nah, definitely” in post-match interview

Spurs striker passes landmark in chat with Gary Lineker.

Spurs boss Pochettino in shock Mr Bean rant

Spends twenty minutes drawing furious comparisons with Dele Alli.

Guardiola and Klopp “will meet after Saturday match” to discuss Pep Show sitcom idea

Liverpool boss set for Super Hans role in Guardiola/Mourinho flat-share romp.

Piegate blown wide open as ‘second pie’ claims surface

Former Sutton goalkeeper Wayne Shaw ate not a pie but two pies, it emerges.

“We won’t be drawn into childish name-calling,” roar Dildo Brothers

West Ham and Sporting Lisbon strike up unlikely bust-up.