Jack Wilshere will miss the rest of the season after incurring a snapped election during yesterday’s upheaval in Westminster.
The political shock waves caused by Theresa May’s announcement reverberated down to the South Coast, upending Wilshere and snapping his election all over the shop.
He will now miss the final five games of his loan spell at Bournemouth from Arsenal, who shrugged wearily when notified of the injury.
Speaking exclusively to Football Burp, Arsène Wenger batted off questions about his future.
He said: “We’re here to talk about Wilshere’s snapped election, aren’t we?
“I keep telling you, there is no news – and don’t go turning that into a ‘Wenger non-committal about future’ headline or I’ll start ordering pizzas to your house.
“Frankly I don’t know why I bother even picking up the phone to you.”
He added: “Now leave me alone.”