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David Davis to consult Ronald Koeman on how much to pay to bow out of Europe

Brexit secretary impressed by speed of exit after £150m spending spree.

By Jonny Abrams

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Everton manager Ronald Koeman
GONE: Ron (Image: Paul Blank)

Brexit secretary David Davis will meet with Everton manager Ronald Koeman for advice on how much money to squander in order to crash out of Europe.

The Conservative minister told Football Burp he was impressed by how quickly the Toffees have exited the Europa League following a summer spending spree of £150m.

Speaking after Everton’s 1-2 defeat to Lyon, Davis said: “To leave Europe for just the £150m, Ronald’s got them a real bargain there.

“He keeps calling this a transitional period, but to my eyes they’re out and somehow he’s managed to do it on the cheap.

“Michel Barnier keeps asking for figures in the billions to settle the Brexit divorce bill, so I’m going to meet Ronald for some friendly advice on negotiation tactics.

“And next time I go to Brussels I shall do so carrying a small child, just to show I’m really not one to be messed with.

“If Ashley Williams could tag along too and barge into Jeremy Corbyn should he attempt to enter the room, that would be grand.”