Celebratory knee slide confirms Di Canio likeability

Fake News » Celebratory knee slide confirms Di Canio likeability

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Paolo Di Canio
Di Canio… Character (Image: Daniel Gómez)

Everyone now loves Paolo Di Canio again after his wild celebrations during Sunderland’s 3-0 win at Newcastle United on Sunday, everyone has confirmed.

The Italian, bat excrement barmy, had been heavily criticised for succeeding Martin O’Neill as manager of the Premier League Black Cats, rather than remain at Swindon Town or some other club that no-one cares about from the lower leagues, where being a fascist is okay.

This came in stark contrast to his playing days with Celtic, Sheffield Wednesday, West Ham United and Charlton Athletic, where the public perception was of a loveable loony as talented as he was unpredictable – but everyone’s feelings about him have come full circle after watching him be all mad and passionate with that madly passionate knee slide in a touchline performance brimming with madness and passion.

Your mate said: “Hur hur hur! Look at Di Canio, he’s loving it! Hur hur hur!

“I totally don’t care that he’s a fascist anymore.”

Another of your mates texted: “Did you see Di Canio’s celebration? Unbelievable passion!

“He’s a real character, you know – I reckon he’ll be great for the Premier League, even if he does wear Mussolini pyjamas.”

Your cousin tweeted: “Di Canio celebrates like a boss! #somethingaboutchucknorris”

Having previously condemned the installation of Di Canio as manager at the Stadium of Light, the football community queued up to lavish praise and attention on the erstwhile object of their ire.

They chorused as one: “Paolo Di Canioooo! Paolo Di Canioooo! Paolo Di Canioooo!

“Paolo Di Canioooo! Paolo Di Canioooo! Paolo Di Canioooo! Paolo Di Canioooo! Paolo Di Canioooo!

“Paolo Di Canioooo! Paolo Di Canioooo! Paolo Di Canioooo! Paolo Di Canioooo! Paolo Di Canioooo!

“Paolo Di Canioooo! Paolo Di Canioooo! Paolo Di Canioooo!”

They added: “Paolo Di Canioooo! Paolo Di Canioooo! Paolo Di Canioooo!”

Di Canio was not available for comment as he was busy hurling spaghetti at a blank canvas while singing opera the top of his voice and crying.

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