The best jokes from England 2-1 Slovakia, World Cup qualifier at Wembley

Jokes » The best jokes from England 2-1 Slovakia, World Cup qualifier at Wembley

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Dele Alli's gesture was the basis for a few of the jokes from England 2-1 Slovakia, World Cup qualifier at Wembley
Dele doesn’t like the jokes (Image: Twitter/@FutballTweets)

This is a selection of the best jokes from England 2-1 Slovakia at Wembley on Monday night, after the hosts came from behind to secure three points towards World Cup qualification.

With just two games left to play in Group F, England sit top of the table, five points clear of tonight’s visitors in second.

But Gareth’s Southgate’s under-pressure side experienced a tough start to the game when Slovakia scored just three minutes after kick off and, at that stage, fans feared the worst.

As they eventually gained the upper hand, these were the best of the jokes from England 2-1 Slovakia:

Even the depressing Verve theme tune on ITV prepares you for the snoozefest about to follow #ENGSVK

— Graham Webb (@GrahamWebb4) September 4, 2017

I shudder to think what type of England fan is sat in my seat at Wembley tonight. Better not be dressed as fucking Shrek

— Coysy McCoysface (@TheSpursDrum) September 4, 2017

Rashford trying to nutmeg someone on the edge of his own box. What could possibly go wro…#ENGSVK

— Liam Moffatt (@lpmoffatt) September 4, 2017

😱 Slovakia take the lead inside three minutes at Wembley!

Southgate right now…#ENGSVK pic.twitter.com/72xuoaBTls

— The Sportsman (@TheSportsman) September 4, 2017

Should've started Martial instead of Rashford. #ENGSVK

— The United Stand (@UnitedStandMUFC) September 4, 2017

0-1 down to Slovakia after 3 minutes.
Imagine if we were playing Fastvakia #ENGSVK

— David Mills (@DavidMills73) September 4, 2017

On the plus side, not a hint of dandruff. #ENGSVK https://t.co/cPNoCcEoFf

— Clive Gritt MBE (@TheCliveGritt) September 4, 2017

Wow, England are following Prince William's example by trying to get time off work to watch the World Cup. #ENGSVK

— Wizards Of Drivel 🎙 (@wizardsofdrivel) September 4, 2017

Which is the bigger PR disaster? #ENGSVK pic.twitter.com/RpFbjdvp9X

— Clive Gritt MBE (@TheCliveGritt) September 4, 2017

👉 Things that are better at stopping shots than Joe Hart…#ENGSVK pic.twitter.com/yyfbGAdcOH

— The Sportsman (@TheSportsman) September 4, 2017

Just saying, Mourinho in Goal would be better than Hart #ENGSVK

— SCHOLES (@iamscholes) September 4, 2017

Butland, Heaton, Pickford, Foster, Forster and a wok hanging from the crossbar are all better options than Joe Hart. #ENGSVK

— Del (@delislb) September 4, 2017

#ENGSVK No wonder Harry Kane scores 20 goals a season, its a law of averages when you shoot 273 times per game, from anywhere.

— Josh Baker (@GNOSHYB) September 4, 2017

Rooney Would rather get pissed up with some tart and then drive her home than play for England under this clown. LAD #ENGSVK

— Liam Fell (@liamfell2010) September 4, 2017

The England fan who ran on the pitch on Friday has been given a life time ban from watching England again…..Lucky B*stard.

— Football Stands (@TheFootyStands) September 4, 2017

After years of town square rioting, plastic chair hurling and xenophobic chanting, England Ultras hit a new low pic.twitter.com/9J3YZ0u34K

— Oldfirmfacts (@Oldfirmfacts1) September 4, 2017

Anyone else wondering whether Slovakia's full back Peter Pekarik has ever picked a peck of pickled peppers? #ENGSVK

— FergalO'BrienRacing (@FOBRacing) September 4, 2017

The FA are looking at rescinding the lifetime ban given to a fan who invaded the pitch, amid fears other England fans will do the same!

— Pie Sports Booze 🔞 (@piesportsbooze) September 4, 2017

Southgate looks like the kind of guy who reads 'terms and conditions' #ENGSVK

— scott newberry (@newbs29) September 4, 2017

Looks like another game needs to be made interesting‍♂️ #ENGSVK

— Jake Peachey (@JTPeachey) September 4, 2017

When someone offers you free England tickets pic.twitter.com/jK9OKgryn0

— Luke (@ClassicMichy) September 4, 2017

That band are going to get a proper fucking shoeing in Russia. Without doubt a core reason to want England to qualify.

— Ste.A (@sarm0161) September 4, 2017

Full time. England win 2-1. Shocking start but deserved the win in the end, and they'll surely lift the World Cup next summer.

— Paddy Power (@paddypower) September 4, 2017

Highlight of the England game so far 😂 pic.twitter.com/1rE3lXGUsu

— Football Tweets (@FutballTweets) September 4, 2017

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