Stoke City have announced Paul Lambert as their new manager, reportedly agreeing a two-and-a-half-year contract after Mark Hughes was dismissed earlier this month.
A series of public disappointments for the club in their pursuit of apparently numerous preferred targets has resulted in today’s appointment of the former Aston Villa and Norwich boss, which has received a mixed reception amongst fans.
These are the best of the jokes as Paul Lambert is named as the next manager of Stoke City:
Paul Lambert fancies a crack at the Stoke job does he? I fancy a crack at Beyoncé mate, doesn't mean it's gonna happen.
— James Proctor (@proctor_dre) January 8, 2018
I see Paul Lambert is still going on about how he watches lots of German football. Does he think this will make him a better coach? I've watched a lot of porn in my time it doesn't mean I'm going to become a plumber and shag a load of housewives #wwfc
— Jimmy B (@onlyonebman) January 9, 2018
Can Paul Lambert do it on a cold, wet Monday night in Stoke?
— Gary Lineker (@GaryLineker) January 15, 2018
Paul Lambert was made for a wet, windy night in Stoke.
— John Brewin (@JohnBrewin_) January 15, 2018
List of Pauls I'd rather have managing Stoke than Paul Lambert:
Paul Blart (Mall Cop)
Paul from the film "Paul"
— Tom (@Morleyyyy) January 15, 2018
'Stoke City are really fucking sorry but we're gonna have to confirm the appointment of Paul Lambert as the Club's new manager.'
— tc (@carlin_thomas) January 15, 2018
I've got a season ticket at Stoke and if we appoint Paul Lambert I'm not going to any more games this season, I'll go next season instead when we're in the championship
— Matthew Degg (@deggyeggy2) January 14, 2018
Paul Lambert taking over Stoke is a fantastic appointment, for every other Premier League team.
— Notorious for Nowt (@LostBoyNUFC180) January 15, 2018
Paul Lambert appointed as Stoke Manager. An appointment that is similar to picking up the sausage roll that’s been drying out in the Greggs heater since 07:00 yesterday morning.
— Wizards O’Drivel (@wizardsofdrivel) January 15, 2018
Potter wants the job.
Flores got booed today, and only broke down because of a wage clause.
Jokanovic is openly annoyed at his owners.
Benitez is openly annoyed at his owners.
Koeman is available.
— Jase (@scfcjase) January 14, 2018
"HOW close is it to Alton Towers?!" pic.twitter.com/DgExB1Fx3H
— MUNDIAL (@MundialMag) January 15, 2018
Stoke City spokesman: "We are delighted to welcome Paul Lambert to the club. Once we'd been turned down by Gary Rowett, Quique Sanchez Flores, Martin O'Neill, Robbie Williams, his good friend Jonathan Wilkes & Trevor from the canteen, we knew Paul was the right man for the job."
— Paddy Power (@paddypower) January 15, 2018
Just told a Stoke fan I work with that they've announced Paul Lambert as manager and he literally put his hands on his head and said "mate, I'd rather you told me that my nan has died", so they're taking it well.
— Adam Partington (@PartAdam) January 15, 2018
Always find it difficult to watch Paul Lambert as his expression is permanently that of a geography teacher at the precise moment he realises he's come back to work too early after being off with stress.
— Sam Whyte (@SamWhyte) January 15, 2018
Stoke appointing Paul Lambert as manager is a 'gone Tesco after the lunch rush and having to settle for a 'Just Ham' sandwich' managerial appointment if ever I saw one.
— Joe Baiamonte (@JoeBaia) January 15, 2018
Overpriced by £1.50
— Chris (@fox_notts) January 15, 2018
Stoke appointing Paul Lambert is the football equivalent of trying to pull someone in the taxi queue at 3 in the morning.
— Ray Bradshaw (@comedyray) January 15, 2018
Stoke’s criteria for new manager – must be European Cup-winning midfielder who managed Wycombe, Norwich and Villa:
Martin O’Neill: rejected it
Paul Lambert: accepted it@TimesSport
— Bill Edgar (@BillEdgarTimes) January 15, 2018
I bet Shaqiri never thought he’d get the chance to work under Paul Lambert
— Gary Megson (@RickyJohnWaters) January 15, 2018
Paul Lambert sounds a lot more exciting if you say his name in a French accent.
— Wizards of Drivel (@wizardsofdrivel) January 15, 2018
When Paul Lambert was confirmed as new Stoke boss, we thought he may not have been first choice, but he could be the perfect man for the job.
Then we thought about it some more, changed our minds, and decided to pay out on Stoke being relegated from the Premier League. pic.twitter.com/UuCPYLhrFu
— Paddy Power (@paddypower) January 15, 2018
15th January: Paul Lambert named new Stoke manager.
19th January: Paul Lambert resigns as Stoke manager as they promised him Hob Nobs with his brews but they backtracked & only gave him supermarket own label Rich Tea.
— David Crossley (@BRFC4Life) January 15, 2018