Casually practises kick-ups to a backdrop of chaos at Goodison.
Manager Steve Bruce says it's been "awful".
Controversial POTUS refuses to lay blame solely at feet of Newcastle midfielder.
Liverpool's Trent Alexander-Arnold becomes latest to make a name - nay, two - for himself.
"It was all CGI, stock footage and his secret twin brother," claim conspiracy theorist Toffees.
There's more money and foreigners and stuff, study finds.
Real Madrid star rewarded with five extra days off work.
See the match as you've never seen one before.
Also kept messing up everyone's coffee orders.
"Conte makes me wipe the blood off my fangs," wails wantaway Chelsea striker.
Repeated the number one three times, then skipped straight to four.
Full-back wants club to sign players you don't "have to Google".
Brazilian forward offers wheelbarrow full of cash up front.
Chelsea defeated in new ABBA format.
Brazilian becomes world's most expensive player.
Real star of European clash was quickly identified by his son on Reddit.
Dating app to be advertised on Red Devils jerseys.
Even the children want the chairman out.
Toffees ace runs with uncharacteristic fervour towards exit door.
Set to kick off season with a trip to Everton Central Midfielders XI.
Chelsea youngster defends family honour as controversy rages.
Superb shot from Gimnasia Mendoza fan during promotion play-off clash.
Deal to include all 330,822 other Icelanders, including Björk.
UK grime star lined up to replace United-bound Lukaku.
Chase to the bar on the fourth day of the first test between England vs South Africa.
Assumed Anton Ferdinand slur just a big misunderstanding, claims new Villa signing.
Quiet dinner with a nice lady interrupted.